Busy Bee Hustling Here

I'm embracing my inner hustler. I have been out of my house for 9 or so straight evenings now. I do not know how my family can be understanding, let alone tolerant, of my behavior. But whatever. I'm trying to carve my place in the world.

I always believed that people should be allowed to make their mistakes. I am also guilty of being a hypocrite about this. I used to be upset when people dear to me screwed up. But at the same time, I needed my own space to screw up.

I can't afford to be inconsistent about this now. I'm dealing with people who may be undergoing many difficult experiences in their lives. I need to be understanding and open to how they choose to live. I don't always have to agree. I just need to be open. I need to allow them that space to make the choices they want.

I remember listening to a guy tell us in a retreat once: God loves us in a way that He gives us profound freedom. He lets us make our own mistakes. He allows us to break His rules, because He trusts us that way.

I'm not a deity by any means, but I understand. I want that kind of love. I want to be able to aim to give that kind of love too.

So tonight, I'm stepping out yet again. Night number 10? I lost count now. What matters is I keep pushing and striving. I gotta keep putting one day after another, helping to make nice things happen for others. I don't expect this to all pay off. I just want to be able to try.